I cannot even come close in imagining the grief you are undergoing right now. Death is loss that is profound and devastating as cuts through the most intrinsic part of your being: your own very heart.
To say that the grief you carry is understandable would only but trivialize the emotional burden of the moment. No one can truly understand it, no one can comprehend the monumental blow his departure has dealt on you.
Therefore, you have every right to weep for his loss. So cry, HIM. Do not let the sense of propriety stop the tears from streaming down your eyes that are already swollen and reddened. Let it all out. In doing so, may it alleviate the storm of feelings that is surging within you.
Dealing with your grief would be a personal path that you will have to tread. It would not be smooth trek; rather, it would be an arduous one that you will have to face, one day at a time. You would have to struggle just to stay in place and not flounder amidst the pain and misery.
However, do not let fear and apprehension overcome you. I am with you, HIM. I may not be able to fight your own battle for you, but I will hold your hand as you face the challenges that lie ahead. Though you may trip and fall, here is what I will assure you: I commit myself to prop and steady you up, without any pause or hesitation whatsoever.
Allow me to end this letter by leaving you with my favorite quote from St. Therese of Avila. These are the words that give a sense of hope and comfort whenever I face difficult moments in my own life:
"Nada te turbe...Todo que pasa"
Let nothing disturb you...Everything passes.
No matter how dark and disconsolate this period may now seem, trust that there is going to be light at the end of the tunnel.
And trust I that I am here to take that journey with you.