"When you sense a faint potentiality for happiness after such dark times, you must grab on to the ankles of that happiness and not let go until it drags you face first out of the dirt - it is not selfishness, but obligation."
Everyone has their own measure of happiness. It is something personal, and should never be gauged against the happiness of others.
Whenever someone shares their own opinion of what happiness should be, be open to it; you can never tell what you can learn from what others say.
However, it is also impolite to force on others the idea of what happiness should be; we are but guests on-board their lives, and not the skipper of their ship.
Happiness is truly an intangible gift; and like most intangibles in life, use it wisely and sow it lovingly - the reaps will be a hundredfold greater whenever happiness is shared with others.
And in that pursuit for happiness, keep in mind that you do not deliberately hurt others. You do not own the sole right to happiness. After all, everyone deserves to be happy.
So go forth, and create your own happiness.
Choose to be happy, strive to be happy - and life will be well worth living.